We start the new year off with a BIG movie, especially according to its star, Mr. Dwayne Mr. “The Rock” E. Normous Johnson. It’s Black Adam, a superhero probably even fewer of you have heard of than Shazam (nee Captain Marvel), in whose pages B. Adam first appeared. He’s not your daddy’s superhero, in that he kills a bunch of people, but he probably is your daddy’s (or granddaddy’s) superhero in the sense that he’s from 1945. Anyway, they made a long, boring movie about him, so we talk about it.

With Black Widow in theaters this week, we talk about the Marvel property everyone’s talking about! The Eternals! Elliott attempts to answer the important question: What’s their deal?

Look, it was probably inevitable that we’d end up discussing Zack Snyder’s Justice League, and we’ll say this — it is certainly the most Zack Snyder-y Justice League we’ve ever seen (check out of our discussion of the theatrical cut here). In fact, it’s SO Zach Snyder-y that it’s four hours long… so we’ve split our ZSJL episode in TWO! That’s double the discussion of this already over-discussed movie. YOU’RE WELCOME, WORLD!

With Infinity War breaking records, it’s time to check in with that OTHER cinematic universe, that hath given the Flop House so much, with our look at Justice League. Meanwhile, Stuart reveals Donatello’s government job, Dan misreads the title, and Elliott posits that Batman is the result of inbreeding.

This is a big one folks. Batman v. Superman v. The Flop House. Meanwhile Stuart makes it very clear this is not your daddy’s anything, Dan does a dead-on Katherine Hepburn, and Elliott reveals how Nicholas Cage rents softcore pornography.

We’ve seen him 3D, but are we ready for Dracula: Untold? Meanwhile Stuart demonstrates his innovative mixology, and Elliot and Dan reveal the surprising Dracula-centric details of the Mad Men finale.

Merry Cagemas everyone! The store was all out of Left Behind (well… it hasn’t been released to video or streaming yet), so we got you a Rage. We hope you’re not too disappointed. Meanwhile Elliott reads the Looney Tunes dinner specials, Dan reveals the medical source of his word-slurring, and Stuart just can’t stop chewing.

Song of the autumn contest winner Jason MacIssac decreed that we should be subjected to legendary season-one-of-American-Idol ancillary flop From Justin to Kelly. Did he take it easy on us, or is there now a bounty on his head? Meanwhile Stuart introduces his innovative new restaurant concept, and Elliott murders Dan on air.