For our second and final Smalltember(vember?) show of 2022, we talk Pinocchio. No, not that one. Not that one either. The Russian one with Pauly Shore. Is that a thing that exists, and not just some weird chain of words we strung together? Apparently! We watched it, so unless it was a collective bi-coastal hallucination, it’s real! And we had to watch it, so now you have to listen!

Stuart welcomes Dan and Elliott to “The Pitch Pit,” his Flop House after-show, which is definitely a long-running podcast and not just something he made up for this mini.

Even though the last few years may have made everyone feel unstuck in time, there are still some things you can depend on — namely that, come the fall, Dan and Elliott will argue about whether it’s Smalltember or Smallvember. Anywhooo, we kick off the smallest time of year with Amityville in Space, the movie that dares ask the question “What if Amityville… but in space?”

Elliott finally makes honest men of Dan and Stu, by quizzing them about movie marriages.

Netflix sure loves to make movies that sit on their home screen for a week or so and then no one talks about again, huh? At least it gave the directors a chance to insult movie theaters. Anyway, we talked about their latest “hit” The Gray Man.

In which Dan’s premise is very silly.

Stuart tries to explain JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure to Dan and Elliott. Are they more confused afterward than they were at the beginning? Perhaps!

Episode 275 is ALIVE! We keep raiding Blank Check for some of our finest guest stars, which is why it was only a matter of time before we’d add “America’s finest film critic,” Ben Hosley, to that list. And Ben asked if he could do “that stupid robot movie from the 80’s,” and following a brief round of “Is THIS the Film?, Dan figured out that Ben was asking for Short Circuit 2. Thus it twas spake. Thus it came to pass.